Sunday, February 23, 2003


"mandy moore did not write this song"


just got back, great concert tonight. must get up early tomorrow morning to give retreaters their art back from the art gallery competition. must go to bed.

Saturday, February 22, 2003


t minus


less than 2 hours until the switchfoot concert. and as much as i love switchfoot, i still would trade this one in if i could make it to the jars of clay and caedmon's call concert tomorrow night in minot, nd.

this is youth quake


4000 youth and youth sponsors
3 days
caronport, saskatchewan
2 big bands (tfc, switchfoot)
kickoff skit
games
1 huge stage
various acts
prayer room
lazer tag
inflatables
overpriced merchandise
packed dorm rooms
b.o. smell everywhere
stinky overused bathrooms
hotdogs
food tents
art
24-7 prayer
juggling
dorm patrol
here 4 you crew
security
essential ID tags

...i have to go, i have to be somewhere locking a room in a few minutes.

simple joy


flannel pajamas.

Friday, February 21, 2003


can you hear Me?

youth quake 2003 begins at 1pm central standard time. i don't expect to see my house again until very very very late tonight.

but i might skip the thousand foot krutch concert tonight. i have a feeling i will be exhausted by then.

Thursday, February 20, 2003


conversation


joanne: so, do you think they will sing the song from the movie?

michelle: yeah, highlight of the weekend!

joanne: do you think because they left this bounce sheet here it means they want it in the dryer?

michelle:: um, i don't know.

joanne: would you put it in the dryer?

michelle: um, no, i wouldn't want to chance it and put in something that shouldn't have been in there.

joanne: okay. that's probably best. (pause) so, do you think they'll say something about jamie sullivan?

this of course is all in reference to the switchfoot concert this weekend, with some laundry banter thrown in for your own personal enjoyment, because you, after all, will not be here to enjoy the concert.

oy


it's 12:30am and my stomach does not feel so good... i don't have time to be sick.

Wednesday, February 19, 2003


my day


i'm going to write a post about my day today... because, well, it's my blog and i can write what i want to... although sometimes (or actually more often than not), i think that i should write something profound and insightful and interesting, but that's just not going to happen tonight.

so today i went out for lunch with my visiting friends carrie and natty, and we also took the fabulous lowana with us as well, and had a perfectly fabulous time... only got a million looks from the lady with the mullet two tables over who apparently did not appreciate our laughing.

then tonight i worked on some decorations for the art gallery for youth quake... hopefully it is going to look cool schmoole, but we'll only know tomorrow when it is officially all done and painted and decorated.

now i need to be getting out of this library with it's beautiful fast internet connections and back to my slow computer at home to work on the scheduling for yq so i can get those out to my volunteers for the weekend so they know exactly what they are doing.

good night.

ugh


i don't like posting in the library. i don't like working in the library in general. i feel like there are a million people staring at me and reading my every word.

maybe i'm just still too self concious. i thought i would grow out of that after the end of junior high... but (excuse me while i go and check)....................... nope, i haven't grown out of it yet.

looking for


i've always noticed a lot of discussion of romance/love/future spouses/etc. in general in blogs, and the past couple of days i have noticed an extreme amount of it… and also due to events in my life as of late i've been thinking about it too.

tim has an interesting discussion going on over at .future.hope (see the feb 1e post that starts with "I've been in a very Coldplay state of mind"), and carly's got some interesting things to say in a recent post as well (see feb 18th's post "my entire life, i've come in second place". (my apologies, i couldn't figure out how to directly link).

and once upon a time last semester I signed up for a free issue of elle magazine and am still getting it (if there's anyone from elle out there reading this, please quit sending it to me, I don't want your magazine for the gazillionth time and I'm not gonna pay for it), and found the following this month in regards to what joshua jackson of dawson's creek fame looks for in a girl:

"A pulse is a good place to start," he jokes. "What I mean is, I try not to prejudge. Life would be boring if I said, 'Okay, all the blondes and redheads out, anybody over five-foot-seven out.' That would be more like catalogue shopping than romance."
- Joshua Jackson, in Elle Canada, March 2003, pg. 56.

Tuesday, February 18, 2003


here i am again


so here i am in the library again, where the internet connection is a gazillion times faster than the one that beams itself into my room via my phoneline. ah, the wonders of dial-up (that was a joke).

so, how are you guys doing out there? i was wondering, because it seems like no one is blogging. i haven't really felt like blogging lately either. i think these past couple of days were a world blogging slump. or maybe it was the fact that everyone uses haloscan comments and they were down so no one wanted to blog because we all know that we webloggers live for the intereaction of comments.

something mildly disconcerting, i find, is our "computer lab checking-out situation." there are a bunch of long desks back to back with computers on them in here and so when you look past your computer monitor's left side, which is basically the centre of your vision, you are looking directly at the person using the computer behind yours. it feels like people are continually looking at you, or checking you out perhaps. mildly disconcerting, i know, that's what i said!

i've had a long day, all day getting stuff ready for youth quake. yq is canada's largest youth conference, and this weekend, our little campus will welcome 4000 more people from across canada and the usa and some overseas for one cool intergalactic weekend. (i've always wanted to use the word intergalactic in my blog. i figure i'll get some cool hits from that one ;) ) anyways, back on topic here.... i'm in charge of the art gallery, so have been busy getting that into motion and getting people signed up to help out with stuff, getting the prizes ready, etc. etc. should be a fun but terribly exhausting weekend... including the switchfoot concert saturday night.

anyways kids, i should be heading off home, and maybe see if anyone is around. i have two houseguests (carrie and natty) this week whom i haven't seen all day... and another one is arriving tonight (alaina). take care and have a super duper evening and day.

"He who loves a pure heart and whose speech is gracious will have the king for his friend."
- Proverbs 22:11

Monday, February 17, 2003


looking


if you're looking for the lyrics to jars of clay's "the valley song" (my webstats keep telling me that you are ;) ), click here.

here i am


i'm at the library tonight, alone, doing pretty much nothing... a boring night.

it's someone's birthday today. but i wasn't invited to the party.

i hate it when friendships fade away or die or become one sided. one of life's great sorrows.

to do list


dream big. do something unexpected. fall in love. drive alone. sing in the rain. quit biting nails. stop worrying. finish homework. finish school. publish something again. sew another quilt. clean room. do laundry. take more photographs listen to more music feed the hungry. give to the poor be in two places at once. have an art show. get over self-conciousness. read my Bible more. quit relying on myself so much. quit obsessing so much. not forget that i've given it all to God.

in other news

i have decided to redo my sidebar a bit... and so am committing this to the archives today:

i want to live life freely.
i want to fly across the ocean.
i want to breathe the air in England.
i want to walk the streets of new york city again.
i want to see the louvre.
I want to tour frank lloyd wright's house.
i want a happy holiday.
i want to feel that tingly sensation when i hold hands for the first time.
i want everyone to like me.
i want to dream unashamedly.
i want to unabashedly experience love.
i want to be married.
i want to have a home.
i want my grandmother to be able to meet my husband.
I want to share my memories with someone.
i want to fall asleep in the arms of the man that God has created for me.
I want to have no doubts.
i want to love others without worrying what other people think.
i want to get over past regrets.
i want to embrace my past and be hopeful for the future.
i want to learn to play the piano.
i want to paint a great painting.
i want to be remembered as one who loved.
i want to have children.
i want to share the Word of God unashamedly.
i want to pray without ceasing.
i want to live without fear.
i want to embrace the gifts I've been given.
i want to not care if my friends don't agree.
i want to speak in public and not be nervous.
i want to sing alone without being embarrassed.
i want to experience a prairie summer again.
i want to renew old friendships that i miss.
i want to be a mentor.
i want to share Christ with many.
i want to see Christ change the lives of those close to me.
i want to see my family all come to salvation.
i want people to not be afraid to talk to me.
i want to be approachable.
i want to raise my children in the faith.
i want my husband to be completely and totally head-over-heels in love with me for who i am and who i will be.
i want to be totally and completely head-over-heels in love with my husband for who he is and who he will be.
i want to hear "well done, good and faithful servant," when it is over.


funny


funny how God helps us do things we don't think we can, funny how he helps us handle the impossible.

just yesterday i thought "i can't handle it, if this ever happens", and then it did... and i think i'm fine.

thanks God.

speechless.

wondering what to risk


The other day while I was driving home my world was shaken… it occurred to me that I had left too many risks untaken, I'm always sitting here just waiting for a revelation. Is it ever gonna come?

All this searching yet my destiny is still unfound, makes me realize this world will always let me down. So it seems that the only hope I ever had was everything that You are.

I'm falling down, tumbling after You, I'm overwhelmed, tripping over simple truth. In all I've found there's nothing that's more beautiful than what I've found in You. You could always see right through the front I'd offer you, not believing my excuses waiting for the truth, when you could have turned your back and walked away from me, you picked me up instead.
- Starfield, "Tumbling After"

Saturday, February 15, 2003


funners


funners just happens to be one of my favourite words, although technically it is not a proper word, i think it's a gooder. ; )

i went to moose jaw today with maria, anna, joanne, and barclee, we went to the mall and out for supper, which was nice. i got some new jeans, over which i am very excited, for i cannot remember the last time i bought new jeans, probably a year ago. i've been sustained on second hand finds, mainly jeans from friends that were too small for them, or cheap thrift store bargains. but it's always hard to find nice jeans second hand.

on another note, totally unrealted, what is up with this weather? i think it has snowed every day for at least the past week, if not longer. my hands are chapped, it's too cold outside. there are not many things i hate, but chapped hands i definitely do.

i must run, i'm at the library and it's closing in a few minutes. my roommates have been on the phone non-stop all night so i couldn't get online to check my email. but my real purpose for coming here was actually to sign out "the ten commandments" (filmed in 1923) for the second time... it's on 5 hour reserve but since the library's not open tomorrow i can keep it until monday morning... so i have all tomorrow to work up the excitment to watch it. (i have to for my upcoming class).

it's going to be good, right? it's not going to be snoring boring, is it?

hypothetical surreal valentine's day


so susie* went out with some friends to starbucks on valentine's day and it ended up that her friend midge's older brother paul was there... paul, whom susie thinks is fabulous but never gets to hang out with. susie thought that this was a very surreal way to spend valentine's day. she thinks paul is just peachy.

but susie has liked this guy named hubert for a very very long time, two years in fact. but, hubert moved away, far away, just recently, and while susie and hubert still chat, susie has pretty much resigned herself to the fact that nothing will ever happen between her and hubert... and this makes her sad.

when susie returned home from her valentine's evening at starbucks, she found, low and behold, that suzy, the girl that hubert likes, a girl she has never met, is staying at her house that evening. suzy, is of course, pretty nice, and hard to dislike, except for the fact that she doesn't like hubert and doesn't know what to do about him... he gave her a framed picture of himself for Christmas, which everyone has to admit, pretty weird. and he keeps calling her and emailing her. but she doesn't want him to.

this makes susie sad. she wishes hubert could find a nice girl to like, a nice girl who likes him back and knows how fabulous he is. a girl like her.

*all names have been changed.

Friday, February 14, 2003


Happy Valentine's Day


i was hoping to have a pink template ready for today, and just for today... but despite all my efforts i was either stuck with a teal section that i couldn't get rid of, or no comments... so you guys i guess are stuck with the periwinkle/bluish/accidental background that seems to go well with the raindrops.

i've actually been thinking about getting rid of the raindrops, or maybe going to a different colour or template, but then would it still be mikao's world? and, i've also thought about getting a new blog name... but i can never think of anything i'm satisfied enough with, so i just stick with what i've got.

mikao, by the way, is my "camp name," short for mary kate and ashley olsen (m.k.a.o.), who of course played "michelle" on "full house."

this post isn't very valentine-ish now is it?

Wednesday, February 12, 2003


accomplishment


i just finished this, and also this, so i thought i’d let you take a peek. : )

dialogue


me: ooo, i've got all clean pajamas.

joanne: what? you've got Korean pajamas?

me: no, i've got all clean pajamas, but that would be fun, traveling around to different countries buying pajamas.

joanne: hello, i think we've just found ourselves a new career.

me: what?

joanne: like we couldn't do that… travel around, buying pajamas, taking pictures, and making a book with some sort of crap cool cover to sell at Chapters. we'd make a fortune!

one month


i just found out today that not only will downhere be here march 12, with opening band even, but, they also have a second opening band... (insert drum roll here)... starfield!

i am pumped.

Tuesday, February 11, 2003


so...


and so i have nothing fascinating or even remotely interesting to blog about, today was one dull day. dull dull dull. i pretty much did nothing that i could call an accomplishment, nothing i can be proud of, since most of my day i spent working on a silly template.

i did, however, look at my notes for my next upcoming class, "Screening Scripture: The Bible in Cinema and Film," that is the week of march 3-7. there is a whole truckload of notes (282 pages of photocopied notes that cost a mere $53!), plus three textbooks, and a bajillion films to watch, i had better get cracking.

but i don't want to watch boring films (romeo and juliet, circe 1968 and 1996, the ten commandments, etc). i want to do something fun.

but my reward for watching boring films will be doing something fun. well, actually, a few fun things:

a) my friends carrie from idaho and natasha from alberta are coming on friday for almost a whole week. whooohoooo.
b) my friend alaina is coming next week for 6 days.
c) youth quake is coming up in a week and a half. whooohooo switchfoot!
d) i just found out today that my old roommate heather from ontario is coming march 11th and will be here march 12 for the downhere concert. yippeeee.
e) my friend lisa is coming to visit march 7-13 from ontario. coolness.

so, yeah, i need to go and get watching some shakespeare... so that when carrie and natty come i don't have to force them to watch shakespeare. : )

have a great night guys.

ugh!


i've been working on a new template all day... very very frustrating. can't find the renegade code that is causing the trouble.

Monday, February 10, 2003


you


i wish that he was here. i wish we could hang out.

'Cause you know I'd walk
A thousand miles
If I could
Just see you
Tonight

It's always times like these
When I think of you
And I wonder
If you ever
Think of me

- Vanessa Carlton, A Thousand Miles


days like


days like today i wonder if i really know who i am and where i'm going. days where nothing tactile gets accomplished and it's a simple joy to be living and breathing one more day, basking in the hope that there are better days to come.

days like today are blustery weather days and calm weather days, days where nothing can be predicted and things can change in a moment with no notice or warning or red flag. not even a little blinking light or a doorbell. nothing.

days like today are fraught with misunderstandings and deep understandings, and caring too little and caring too much.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and lean not on your own understanding..."

- Proverbs 3:5

the valley song
(sing of Your mercy)
-written by Aaron Sands, Dan Haseltine, Charlie Lowell, Stephen Mason, and Matt Odmark

"You have led me to the sadness
I have carried this pain
On a back bruised, nearly broken
I'm crying out to You

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy


When death like a gypsy
Comes to steal what I love
I will still look to the heavens
I will still seek Your face

But I fear you aren't listening
Because there are no words
Jus the stillness and the hunger
For a faith that assures

Alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia

While we wait for rescue
With our eyes tightly shut
Face to the ground using our hands
To cover the fatal cut

Though the pain is an ocean
Tossing us around, around, around,
You have calmed greater waters
Higher mountains have come down"

- performed by Jars of Clay

i've been getting a lot of hits lately looking for the lyrics for this song, so I thought I'd post the full lyrics, they don't seem to be out there on the web yet. I hate it when you're looking for lyrics and can't find them. I love the line, "because there are no words," as well as the chorus. great song.

ugh


don't you just love blogger? : )
template problems, try #2



if you can actually get this picture to work (you can type the address into your browser), that's me second from the right.
* An increase in the number of common law couples from 6% in 1996 to 16% in 2001. (This compares with 8.2% in the US, 24.5% in Norway, and 30% in Sweden).
* An increase in the number of children living with common law parents from 3.1% in 1981 to 12.8% in 2001.
* An increase in the number of children living with lone parents from 12.8% in 1981 18.8% in 2001, and a decrease in the number of children living with two married parents, from 84.1% in 1981 to 68.4% in 2001."

Source: Kids First Canada.

get out


"The number of adults aged 20 to 29 still living with their parents has increased from 27.5% in 1981 to 41.4% in 2001 (with the highest percentage in Newfoundland at 50.9% and the lowest in Saskatchewan at 29.8%)."

Source: Kids First Canada.

prima


this afternoon after church, jodi, holly, and i ventured off to the big city of regina, saskatchewan, for some quality time. chapters bookstore (kind of like barnes and noble, for you americans... i love bookstores like chapters, they have way better selection than a library… except you can't take the books home for free, or just non-commitment borrow them either). anyways, looked through a bunch of awesome art books, found some neato journals (I have a real weakness for beautifully bound journals), and bought nothing. yay willpower! : ) some people think the real plus factor of chapters is the fact that they have a starbucks in them, but i'm not a coffee fan, books are much more exciting to me.

then later we went to value village (a thrift store)… and none of us found anything which is really strange, and to the cornwall centre mall. i found a really nice wool cable knit scarf at the gap that i had seen before Christmas that i really liked, but back then it was $58 (who pays that much for a scarf???). now it's on for $12, but they only had a black one, and i thought, what do i need another scarf for, and my peacoat is navy, so it really wouldn't match anyway. i did however succumb to the allure of some really good smelling and cool looking cranberry and spiced pear candles at the body shop that were on for half price that i had also seen before Christmas but did not buy. so that was my big purchase today, a couple of candles. i've never boughten candles before, i'm more of a cool lamps person, but now my room will smell lovely.

then, we went to this restaurant called "pasta prima" that none of us had been to before, and had a lovely supper. it was all homemade fresh pastas, super good stuff. so, yeah, if you're ever in regina, go to pasta prima.

Sunday, February 09, 2003


notice


lately i've had a significant increase in web traffic. i'm not sure what this is due to, although i've noticed a lot of visitors surfing in. most of my referrals come off of tim's and kathleen's blogs, but lately i've also had a lot off of carly's, sarah's, and jenni's blogs. so, welcome here. and thanks to my referrers, you guys are awesome! : )

i've also had a lot of people surfing in off of google looking for lyrics, as well as other assorted searches such as:

a) various desktop themes
b) "worrying what other people think"
c) think outside the bubble school youth ministry
d) "never been willing to give up my heart "
e) "never had a boyfriend"
f) ohio driver's liscence template
g) yukon driver's liscence template
h) canada age of majority card template

just in case you are here because you were searching for something similar, i will let you in on a few fun facts:

a) you will not find any desktop themes here
b) don't do it so often, it's not worth it
c) hmm... yes i'm a youth min major. sometimes i blog about it. stick around, i love to think outside the bubble, although i live in the bubble.
d) oooo, tough one. something i struggle with daily.
e) yes. we're still out here. people like me. we're not freaks, despite popular opinion. hold in there. i'll blog about this another day. but, just to let you in on a little secret, it's not as bad as you think it might be. i'm willing to wait for the right guy rather than settle for the wrong guy.
f) no, i will not help you break the law.
g) see "f", and no, i do not think you should be looking for this.
h) see "f" and "g", and quit trying to break the law(!), it'll only mess up your life and get you in more trouble. trust me.

somehow, this increase in traffic makes me nervous. suddenly i think my entries should be more profound. suddenly i feel like i should have something interesting to say. suddenly i feel like i do nothing to deserve you reading this (13 hits from new brunswick in one day? i've never had a hit from new brunswick before!). there you are, somewhere totally random on this planet, reading this... my little random though.

leave me a comment. let me know that you read this. let us in on where you're from and how you got here. let me in on why you keep coming back. i'm interested to hear. : )




drastic


i've been meaning to get my hair cut for awhile. it was getting what i considered to be a little bit too long. i saw 28 days about a week ago, and so i was thinking i'd maybe get my hair cut like sandra bullock's in that movie, she had such great hair.

but anyway, today i, on the spur of the moment, went to moose jaw, and ended up getting my hair cut. drastic cut. like 8 inches at least. now it's shorter than sandra's, not by much, but still shorter. i've never had my hair cut this short in my entire life. well, i suppose maybe when i was a baby it was shorter. but this is drastic for me. shorter than shoulder length, with layers. usually i just get a straight cut with no layering.

i don't think guys understand what a big deal it is for girls to get their hair cut. or maybe it's just me... am i the only one who makes a big deal out of it? i mean, 8 inches is a lot of hair to get cut off!

but then again, once i got 14 inches cut off at once.

Friday, February 07, 2003


travel


i'm not going to my Gramma's... i needed to have a meeting before i left and it turns out the woman i need to meet with is out of town until tuesday.

but, that's okay, i'll go for my visit at the end of the month as i had planned earlier.

need to get some work done. today is a dry day.

"Silver or gold I do not have, but what I have I give to you..."
- Acts 2:3:6b

Thursday, February 06, 2003


display ideas


for those of you who remember this, you might want to see this.

i encourage you all to replicate the apple display in your home. but not in your store. then i'd feel bad.

change of plans


i was supposed to be going to Montana this weekend and i was really looking forward to it, but the friend i was going with has decided to bail...so, a change of plans is being forced upon me. i was originally planning to go to my Gramma's for a week starting earlier this week and going through to next week, but decided to postpone that until the end of the month. but now, since my weekend is free, i'm thinking i might go. have to talk to my Gramma though and see if it works for her. she's 84, and still lives on the farm my mother grew up on in Manitoba (above North Dakota). she's one of my favourite people, we get along so great and have lots of fun together. : ) usually i go to visit once in the autumn and once in the spring, but i haven't been to see her since last march.

but, this next week i also need to have a little contact with my email to perhaps try and figure out some summer plans. i am in the midst of trying to figure out where God wants me to be this summer. i know that he will bless me no matter what i decide to do, but i worry so much about making the wrong decision. is it possible to go to the "wrong" place? i thought i had it figured out but people keep telling me to do different things and none so far stick out as a "that's totally it!" so i'm in limbo. i am hoping to serve at a church or a camp somewhere. maybe Canada, maybe the US again, we'll see.

so, i am worried about this summer... what to do, where to go. but, i do remember:

For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you because i am fearfully and woderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

-Psalm 139:13-14, 16a

the innocence of childhood

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy
When death like a gypsy
Comes to steal what I love
I will still look to the heavens
I will still seek Your face...
because there are no words
Though pain is an ocean
Tossing us around, around, around
You have calmed greater waters
Higher mountains have come down

- Jars of Clay, "The Valley Song (Sing of Your Mercy)

i got the new jars of clay cd set today, "furthermore". there are two cds, one live from the stage and one from the studio, plus a bonus cd with a few jars songs on it and a few caedmon's call songs. i like this aforementioned song, as well as the new version of "love song for a Saviour." love song will always be one of my favourites. the innocence of childhood. God's great and unending love.

Wednesday, February 05, 2003


images


i'm actually hiding out in the library tonight... hiding from my roommates. well, actually, i guess i'm not technically hiding out, since they know where i am, but i am avoiding them. too much time in house makes me go crazy. although i do love it, it's lots of fun at the best of times... and i love my room, and i love cooking (as opposed to eating in the cafeteria, which does have it's benefits, but i like cooking), and etc. etc. : )

i am listening to my discman at the moment, although i'm superparanoid i'll start singing or something. i don't personally know any of the people in the computer lab i can see, so i don't want to make a bad impression ; ) on these people that i don't know too well! i took one of my ear buds out... just in case... then i'd hear myself singing.

got my links working, sorry they're such bad scans. i think the reflections of the tape work with the blossoms postcard, but not really with the other two. i'll scan before taping next time.

i should go. maybe get some homework done.

i'm totally random even at the best of times. i often wonder if there really is anyone out there who follows my train of thought.

new links


as time allows i have been working on expanding my blog a bit into other realms of me, so i've been developing some webpage content.

voila, here is my first somewhat finished page, some of my artwork linked up.

good stuff


i just wanted to say that i think carly's blog is an all-round cool blog, i'd like to meet this girl some day. found her blog by accident, but am loving reading her posts.

sometimes i get so lost in the little problems of my life that i forget all the joys. the joy of knowing Christ. the joy of knowing his love. the joy of living for him. the joy of being blessed by being able to go to an incredible school. the joy of freedom. the joy of life in Christ.

What do I have
If I don't have you Jesus?
What in this life
Could mean any more?
You are my rock
You are my glory
You are the lifter of my head

- Starfield, "Cry in My Heart

Tuesday, February 04, 2003



so blogger just ate my reflective, thoughtful post, so... maybe i wasn't supposed to post it?

it was about trying to discern God's will.


invite

i got invited to an artists' retreat at the end of march... i'm excited. i've never done anything like that before.

Monday, February 03, 2003


i, i, i survived!


quick update...

good friends are a blessing. joanne was waiting for me when i got done my interview. : )

i did indeed survive. i got a conditional pass... which pretty much everyone gets (you can get a clear pass, conditional pass, or a fail). most of the questions they asked me were on things like "how do you see the relationship within the Trinity?", "how do you recieve from God?", and "what was Christ's purpose for God while here on earth?"... not questions i was at all expecting but good ones to think about. hard ones to think about.

my conditional pass is based on the factor that i need to rework the sections of my paper on baptism, angels and demons, and the return of Christ.

I'm falling down
Tumbling after You
I'm overwhelmed
Trembling over simple truth
In all I've found
There's nothing that's more beautiful
Than what I've found in You

- Starfield, "Tumbling After

may You be honoured and glorified


today was a good day. not great, but good.

tomorrow morning at 11:30 CST begins my exit interview... 45 minutes that all potential B.A. graduates dread. anxiety.

what do i know? that God is as real as the blood in my veins, and that Jesus Christ came and died and shed that blood so that me and you can live forever with him... i know that the passion of God is a very real thing, that his grace and mercy are amazing, and that he continues to astound me every day with his love.

In my heart, there's a fire burning
A passion deep within my soul
Not slowing down, not growing cold
An unquenchable flame
That keeps burning brighter
A love that's blazing like the sun
For who You are and what You've done

- Starfield, "Filled With Your Glory"

Sunday, February 02, 2003


everything


went to a surprise birthday party today which was fun. it was all people that i know casually for the most part, but never hang out with, so that was neat. played a big game of cranium, sometimes i feel so bad in trivia games because i always know all the answers (except for sports... that's my achilles heel), so my team pretty much always wins. in junior high we used to play trivial pursuit and iq2000, and the whole class would get into a big fight because they'd want me to be on their team.

but anyway, in other news, i think i figured out some big stuff... so that's good. life stuff. but then again, maybe i'm just on my way to figuring it out... but it is a road to follow down.

I want you to be
Everything to me
Inside my thoughts
And through my life
I want to know your peace

I want you to be
Everythign to me
No rival throne
No equal love
No other to compete

- Starfield, "Everything to Me"

Saturday, February 01, 2003


good


last night i went to an even concert, and they were playing the new starfield cd before the show opened... so today i went and bought it. i'd highly recommend it to anyone looking for some new music to add to their collection. : )

I've been chasing after emptiness
Trying to tidy up this mess
And I swear I've been down this road before
I wanna get back to where it all began
When I would long for only You

- Starfield, "Can I Stay Here Forever"

february theory


welcome to february everybody, it's nice to be here with you.

february theory (it's nice to be loved) is what i would call my debut cd, if i had one, if i could sing as well as i do in my head. maybe i'll just burn a cd with love songs on it instead and call it february theory. if i had a cd burner.

it's nice to be loved. it's nice to know that people love you. it's nice to think that people might actually like you back. it's nice to get compliments. it's nice to realize that you mean something to people. and it's great to tell other people that they mean something to you. and february is a great time to tell them that.

"Don't be somebody's slogan, because you are poetry."
- Sandra Bullock, in 28 Days