mikao's world

i am so loved

beth and i have to interview parents for our class (youth and family ministry practicum), and so tonight we went to visit with a stay at home mother who has one daughter in grade 11 and one daughter in college. the passion that she has for parenting and mothering really struck me as beautiful.

i did not come from a family with strong Christian convictions, so it was awesome to see how God plays out in this woman's parenting and how passionate she is about instilling godly values and convictions into her children. i had never talked to a Christian parent about parenting before, and it was really eye-opening.

i would have to say that for the majority of my life i really didn't see myself as having children. well, i always thought i would grow up, get married, and have two kids, a son and a daughter. but then i started to think about giving birth when i was older into my teens, and i was so grossed out that i decided not to have kids. but i have learned a lot lately, and one of those things is that God has instilled mothering skills in me, and... i actually want to be a mother which is something that for many years i never thought i would say. friends have really been encouraging me in this area, unbeknownst to them i am sure, they do it so naturally that i know it is God's hand working through them.

but here i am, twentyfour years old, not married, and i've never had a boyfriend. when my mother was my age she had been married for two years and was pregnant. my older sister, at my age, was already married for a year. but there is no doubt in my mind that i should be anywhere else but here at this moment in time. i have no doubt that God made me to be single today. but i know He has a bigger plan for me. someday, that will include a husband. and some day it will include children. it's so awesome to know that God has things under control. i don't have to worry about them. God is so cool. i am so loved.

"You're so good to me..."
- Corey Doak, "End of Summer"