mikao's world

conversation

last night, joy of all joys, i ended up on a computer with msn messenger. i love msn. i love talking to people online. especially people i know IRL (in real life), or have a somewhat knowledgeable and interactive and reciprocated relationship with online. these are people i hope i get to meet someday.

but, alas, here I am tonight not on a computer with msn. there are only a couple here in this cruddy computer lab. so, i've sent a bunch of emails to people i haven't talked to in a long time hoping to catch up, surfed around checking out blogs, etc... random internet chugging. "internet chugging" is a term i just made up, it refers to one not really surfing, because it is done with a purpose, but in a defined time limit. does that make sense?

and earlier tonight, i tried phoning a bunch of people that i have not talked to in a long time hoping to catch up, and only my good friend and ex-roomate heather was home, but talking to her made my day. we, of all things, talked about boys and how frustrating they are and how we need men who take initiative and aren't afraid of us.

i don't understand it, anyways, and i will point it out to all of you in internet land. why can't guys just talk to me like i'm normal. well, i guess by the generic term "guys" i actually mean guys who like me. why do they have to be afraid of me. i don't get it. it doesn't make sense. especially with guys whom i like back.

i'm not scary! i'm normal! (well, at least i like to think i am... no one has ever told me otherwise, at least, not seriously). just talk to me. i don't bite.

ah, i just don't get it.